Saturday, April 27, 2013

Harold Frank

Today I attended a funeral on our local reserve for this man Harold Frank. I met this man four years ago when I first moved to the Cariboo. At the time I had just started working at a little hole in the wall store out in the middle of no where and Harold was a local man from the rez that frequented this store.
Harold was a quiet, kind hearted, funny as hell, give you the only shirt he had on his back kind of guy. He did not have a home of his own and often slept on any couch he could crash on or do work in order to stay. He struggled with alcohol in his short life of 49 years, but this did not stop him from showing such great kindness to all who encountered him.
There was just something that touched me about him, as I often would see him daily at the store or on the road hitchhiking for a ride. He though if he lifted his pant leg a little that made him a bit more sexy and would possibly secure a ride LOL...he was funny that way. One night after knowing him for a while, he called my home and my husband answered the phone, he told my husband that he loved me, my husband replied to him telling him that he loved me too....Harold would call me his white wife, and I would call him my native husband....we would just joke together that way.....well anyways, on the phone still with my husband Harold asked if maybe he could trade something in order for me to be his wife, and my husband said okay, sure, what do you have to trade....well Harold said he had some fish.....WTF....I am sitting there listening to my husband discuss with my pretend native husband what they were willing to trade for me....when I heard that all I was worth was some fish I was PISSED OFF....I thought I was worth at LEAST a freakin cow, dear, moose......something!!!!
Well....I am truly blessed to have a husband who understand who Harold was and knew that he was totally harmless and innocent and that he meant no harm, he was drunk and just wanted to tell me he loved me, and that particular night I really was a lucky girl.....I had two men agreeing on the phone that they loved me :-)
My daughter even got in on this little joke of Harold being my native husband, that when she saw him she would call him Dad jokingly, she would come to my work and bake cookies  for Harold at Christmas so he felt loved and had fresh home made Christmas cookies, such a precious kid I have.
Years after I didn't work at that store and I was now working in the bigger town from the small one, I would see him in a store, and yell across the store to him "'s my husband and where's my hug"...he would just grin ear to ear, come over and we would have a big hug, he'd ask how is daughter was, and I would say to him "better if you'd be paying child support", then we'd laugh our asses off as others in the store looked at us horrified, as this is a SMALL town, and they knew HE was not my husband we always thought it was funny wondering what all the others were thinking, but we didn't care.
Last Monday I got "the call" at work.....Harold had been found that morning and he was no longer with us. It was heartbreaking, I called my husband right away, he too was saddened. Harold just had this way of becoming part of your life, and he will always be in our memories.
Today at the funeral my heart broke, but it was a great experience hearing his history and stories of his life from his family, and the traditional native drumming that just pierced my soul, one could not help but to be moved by such a profound experience.
So I just wanted to share with the world, that there was a great man in it for a while, and his name was Harold, and to know him was to be blessed in one way or another.
Safe travels my friend and thank you for being in my life for the short time.
I leave you all with this quote I found on line today....

"Life is not a race-but indeed a journey. Be honest. Work hard. Be choosy. Say "thank you," "I love you," and "great job" to someone each day. Go to church, take time for prayer. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh. Let your handshake mean more than pen and paper. Love your life and what you've been given, it is not accidental - search for your purpose and do it as best you can. Dreaming does matter. It allows you to become that which you aspire to be. Laugh often. Appreciate the little things in life and enjoy them. Some of the best things really are free. Do not worry, less wrinkles are more becoming. Forgive, it frees the soul. Take time for yourself - plan for longevity. Recognize the special people you've been blessed to know. Live for today, enjoy the moment.”


1 comment:

  1. Hopefully Harrold gets a better one next time around